Lorien drops Bjorn (Session 28)
After the Sea Hag fell, Lorien offered to carry Bjorn’s body out of the cave. Cisco convinced Yort Li to carry him instead. Lorien beseeched the party for help. The party ignored him. Lorien rolled a Nat 1, hurt his back, and dropped Bjorn into the water below. Goodbye Bjorn. Stormeye was aghast. Elijah started laughing uncontrollably and was still trying to regain himself as he climbed aboard the ship.
Three Nat 20s in a row vs the Sea Hag (Session 27)
Yort Li, enbiggened, lumbered over and used his inspiration to Inflict Wounds on the Sea Hag. Nat 20 → 8d10 → 53 damage. Inspired, Elijah turned away from the enemy he was engaging and charged the badly injured Sea Hag — provoked an opportunity attack. Nat 20. Downed Elijah, gave him a permanent exsanguinating injury. Third in a row on the same turn (Fernie got one too). Lingering injury: cut artery. RIP achilles heel.
Edward — first to fall, then fell again (Session 15 / Session 20)
Edward — a guard — struck the killing blow on the forest chain at the chained oak. The resulting blast incinerated him to blue dust. “The first of many to fall, but also the first to rise.” — Lord Alric.
Five sessions later, in Session 20, the party walked into the blood-rune room of Brackenford manor needing a sacrifice for the bowl. Cisco handed Elijah the goop of the soldier who had turned into a ghost and died — Edward’s saved remains. Poured into the bowl. The goop boiled and smoked, and the smoke took the form of Edward, mouth open in a silent agonizing scream. RIP brother.
Roleplay legends
Lorien’s silent vigil (Session 11)
Lorien went to give condolences to the newly-widowed Morella (the Mousey Woman) after Ruasar killed her husband. He crept up behind her and froze for ~10+ minutes without a word, then left without a word
Yort Li at the Briney Breeze (Session 04)
Yort Li went to Ethel’s apothecary alone, used thaumaturgy to blast the door open for entrance, calmly walked in, and asked for foot cream. Bought the cream. Had to pay for the door. On the way out, cast thaumaturgy one more time to make the broken door call the shopkeep a bitch.
Yort Li’s “John” alias (Session 09)
To dodge having to admit to Dear Li that he was his father, Yort Li introduced himself as John. The cover blew immediately.
Yort Li heals Elijah with his cut-off dick (Session 07)
Direct quote from the original notes: “Healed [Elijah] with his cut-off dick.” No further context survives.
Dear Li throws up on Lorien (Session 11)
Lorien hyped up Dear Li to talk to Yort Li. Dear Li got drunk and played dragonchess with Elijah instead, clearly didn’t know how to play, was very rowdy, and threw up on Lorien. Killed the vibe. Cisco cast Prestidigitation to clean him up.
The carriage / steed contract (Session 29)
Lorien’s celestial warhorse steed (gifted by Ilmater) and Cisco’s carriage stared each other down on departure from Brackenford. The steed: proud, haughty. The carriage: dependent, servant-like. Cisco gave a speech urging them to work together. A contract appeared in a fiery flourish. Cisco grabbed an appearing quill and started striking out any liabilities to himself and any caveats. The carriage entities said they’d take it up with the union. The horse walked off mid-Lorien-speech.
Elijah and the trust check (Session 31)
After the dragonborn pursuers arrived in Greyhaven, Elijah sat back-to-wall in Adrik’s room with sword drawn when Lorien came in. Asked: what would you do if someone tried to sacrifice Fernie for power? Lorien: it would be unjust. Lorien threw his sword to the ground and sat in companionable silence.
Lorien takes the Heart (Session 15)
Lorien pulled the heart artifact out of Lord Alric’s chest using Lay on Hands. Ilmater intervened directly and the heart sank into Lorien’s chest with the god’s blessing. He’s been undead-tinged ever since.
Stormeye’s eye crawls onto his head (Session 28)
Cisco tried to convince Stormeye to take out the trap-eye. The eye was 100% aware, contemplated the offer, popped itself out of its socket and crawled on top of Stormeye’s head. Cisco asked what it wanted; the eye shrugged with its tendrils. Cisco Suggestion’d it into his bag. Lyle refused to take it. Whole thing was a disaster. Eye went back to Stormeye.
Hat of rats, weaponized (Session 32)
Mid-heist at Warehouse 17. The party was climbing in through a window. The remaining outside guard was getting fed up with the noise. Cisco cast Minor Illusion to spawn a swarm of enormous rats — and then pulled out and threw three actual hats of rats at the guard for good measure. The guard threw his lantern away and sprinted into the darkness, howling while swinging his sword frantically.
Lorien blesses the guards (and doesn’t know Cisco helped) (Session 32)
After Adrik bluffed Lorien forward as his “apprentice” to two warehouse guards, Lorien took the lead by starting a Ceremony and asking the guards if they wanted to call upon the divine. He invoked Ilmater. Cisco, unseen, cast Minor Illusion to make angelic sounds emanate from Lorien. The guards wept, realized this dedication was their true calling, accepted Lorien’s blessing, and left to spread the word of Ilmater. Lorien looked at his hands, extremely satisfied and further enraptured by Lorien.
He does not know Cisco helped.
”He is so humble!!” — Lorien meets his cult (Session 33)
The morning after the Warehouse 17 heist, Lorien walked toward the Collegium muttering about his mission (“Find a magic man”) and walked past the fish market. There, on an overturned crate, was one of the guards he blessed the night before — wearing a Gilded Watch uniform modified into a shitty Ilmater symbol, preaching about the Painbearer. The preacher spied Lorien and exclaimed:
“Salutations, prophet of the Crying Lord!”
He produced a copy of Trials of the Painbearer, a 17-page pamphlet — already, somehow, despite not having been out of the party’s sight that long.
Lorien looked with disgust at the pamphlet, dropped it, and stomped on it. Pulled out the Tome of Torment: “Follow the Tome, not the Painbearer. I am no prophet.”
The preacher cried:
“He is so humble!!”
“He has spoken! We have angered the Lord!”
The crowd tore up their own pamphlets and stomped on them. Lorien stormed off.
”A guest, a guest!!” — Lorien meets YGOR (Session 34)
Lorien got lost on the way to Mistress Quill in the Collegium and stumbled, instead, into the basement laboratory of YGOR — body parts in jars, circulatory system pinned to the wall, both hands writing independently, body-odor-stenched. YGOR cried “A guest, a guest!!”, recognized the Heart on sight, came back with sharp tools for “the mysteries”, and reassured Lorien that death is a concept before touching the heart and noting that Lorien should be dead.
YGOR
“Death is a concept, but don’t worry my boy — it will be painless.”
“Dissection not possible. Extraction maybe possible.”
YGOR called him a specimen. Hinted that the Weeping Lord (Ilmater) may have use for him later. Disappeared the moment Lorien opened the door. Left a note saying come back soon.
I (Andrew) is convinced that Lorien was about to get killed in several different ways.